The scariest thing I have ever faced is looking into my own mind because often when I go in there, I don’t recognise anything. It doesn’t have the safety a home should possess.
I don’t recognise the decor, I don’t recognise the paintings or pictures hanging on the walls hell I don’t even recognise the person living there.
Her eyes are faded and hidden from me. I can’t see her smile either. I can’t even see her face properly, the shadows covering it are too dark.
A guest in my own mind. It would make me laugh, if only the lump in my throat would move, if only I could claw it out.
It feels as though I’m watching her destroy my house after kicking me out.
The only thing I do recognise is a light covering the bottom of the house. Though it is small, it’s still present and it’s keeping the house alive.
To be a guest in my own mind is scary but watching it get destroyed from the outside is worse.
I want to go home.